Crowdfunder for album celebrating ‘complexity, found joy and community’ in disability

Contemporary alt-folk songwriter Hannah Pawson is crowdfunding to support the latest iteration of her musical project Fritillaries, an album which explores the personal territory of accepting disability through the expanded musical terrains of alt-pop and trip hop.

Pawson wrote the album over 18 months following an intense flare up of symptoms stemming from undiagnosed Myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome (ME/CFS) that “entirely uprooted” her life.

“This album has been my process of navigating and accepting disability and meeting the full wildness of myself,” she said. “Since that time I’ve been navigating the world of living with a disability and learning how to manage. I made this album for myself.”

With reports that energy limiting conditions such as ME/CFS, long covid, fibromyalgia and autoimmune diseases are on the rise, the album reflects the lived experience of an increasing number in society.

Pawson’s music has been described as “wonderful” by BBC 6 Music’s Cerys Matthews, “outstanding” by Folk Music UK and “beautiful, intense and emotional” by Americana UK.

Instead of reverting to her usual domain of “sad music” for this latest album Pawson has ventured into new musical territory.

She wanted to create an album that not only reflects the difficult parts of accepting chronic illness, but also includes: “songs I could dance to, feel understood by, celebrating in the complexity, found joy and community that disability can bring.”

The album’s title, The Magician, refers to a tarot card Pawson drew in a period between ‘crashing’ and recovering from being unwell: “It felt like the exact embodiment of the person I had always tried to be, someone I now couldn’t be,” she said.

“The old ways in which I was living were making me unwell. Always available, responsible, infallible, unflappable, emotions removed to make other people comfortable.”

Fritillaries is no stranger to deep themes, having previously written albums exploring grief and ‘things unearthed from the spaces the light doesn’t reach’ – photo: Kaya Oatley

The album’s 12 tracks reflect the full range of emotions Pawson experienced while coming to terms with her condition including despair, confusion, “learning to rest and become slower within a world obsessed with productivity”, and finding a new way to embrace life. She describes it as “defiant and joyful”.

The approach seems apt for the artist whose name is derived from the snake’s head fritillary, a flower symbolising rebirth and hope.

Pawson is crowdfunding just over half of the £11,000 needed to self-produce the album. She is using an ‘all or nothing’ model on kickstarter, meaning if she does not reach her £7,000 goal she loses all pledges.

With three days to go and 78 pledges made, she has just over £1,000 left to raise to be able to bring The Magician into fruition.

Find out more and donate at www.kickstarter.com/projects/fritillaries/fund-fritillaries-new-album-exploring-tarot-and-disability 

Main image: Moon Immisch

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